


Them

by mountland



Category: Original Work
Genre: Courtly Love, Dysfunctional Family, Family Secrets, Other, Past Child Abuse, Poetry, Unrequited Crush, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-28
Updated: 2019-10-12
Packaged: 2020-10-30 03:08:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20807531
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mountland/pseuds/mountland
Summary: Poems about courtly & unrequited love, and tales about my family.CW: for 6th chapter/poem which references child abuse (not explicit) and suicidal thoughts (not explicit) .





	1. Tattoo

I want to tattoo you upon my chest  
A silent act of devotion  
On my heart your mark made manifest  
Branded by emotion  
Would it call you home  
Like a whispered prayer  
Guiding you as you roam  
To find it hidden there


	2. Brackish waters

If you called I would come,  
Running through hills and valleys.  
Leaving behind the woods of home,  
Flowing into your eddys and gullies ,  
To meet you by the sea,  
With no more than a gentle sigh,  
To my unspoken plea.  
My roaring flow you would pacify.  
Your vastness absorbing me.  
The chance to taste your salinity,  
The touch of you setting me free,  
Reaching together for infinity.  
Turning us to brackish waters,  
Beneath a twilight sky.  
Your tide irrevocably alters  
Mine, sending me awry.


	3. Want

There is a hole in my chest the shape of you  
I feel its presence everywhere I go  
It can be filled by only you  
But you do not love me  
And so it remains  
Knawing  
Gaping  
Want  
You  
Me


	4. The Sea

You are the sea  
So vast and strong  
Gentle rhythm lapping at the shore  
Carrying the boats that depend on you yearlong

I am the river  
Running from where I fell  
Churning and swirling over rocky paths  
As I flow windingly towards you by nature’s compel


	5. Forgive me

Please forgive me for what I can not undo  
This ball of fire burns with no rest,  
Yet within only one of us does it shine.  
This star living inside my chest,  
Whispering please be mine,  
I reach towards the breezeless night of you.

Brightness burning through my deeds.  
Your gentle decline turned supernova,  
Now a black hole claws at my centre.  
I love you I whisper over and over,  
Our constellation my words disenter,  
Falling through a sky that bleeds.

The warm embrace of friendship,  
Tying my ship beneath your star.  
Forgive me for wanting what you cannot return,  
For wanting to change what we are.  
Forgive me for this fire that threatens us to burn,  
Plunging us into starless dark, the words upon my lip

Please forgive me for loving you


	6. The Wolf

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> CW: Reference to child abuse & suicidal feelings (both mild, not explicit)

It starts, as do all tales that last  
In a land not so far away  
A land called the unforgotten past  
A boy is born into this universe  
Into a family with a curse

For every boy a wolf he will become  
It’s den settled in his heart  
Howling away until he succumbs  
The wolf turns his love perverse  
Into a need to hurt, maul and coerce 

I do not know where it all began  
I shall start with the first I knew to fall  
Who was beaten by his old man  
The wolf set free with belt and anger  
From father to son it did clamber

That boy swore to keep it at bay  
His children only heard the wolf  
As it tore apart their mother like prey  
The youngest, a boy, swore to above  
Swore the wolf would not touch his love

A daughter he had, once and once again  
Shall we try for a third asked his wife  
But he knew he had to break the chain  
My love it is too dangerous to be done  
For we must not ever have a son

As the eldest grew a secret stirred within  
A truth of a son ready to be reborn  
But the world could not yet see him  
While the wolf tore into everyone  
Wife, daughter and the not yet son

But he was clever the growing son  
A plan started to form in his mind  
Before the wolf saw him he could run  
If I run fast and long it may not catch me  
I am the first to have this chance, to be free

And so I ran and ran from all the pain  
I do not know if I left in time  
Does the wolf now lurk inside my veins  
My love, I hope for me he does not come  
If he does I shall end it all before I’m overcome


	7. The Garden

I have only ever loved ghosts,  
Grown from the soil of loneliness,  
Emulating nature erroneous.  
My heart given as a willing host.

Watered with overflowing need to give,  
For it wells up within me, it must pour out,  
Into the fiction of you, us, to sate this drought.  
The lack of return is nothing to forgive 

For this you does not exist,  
My sculpture of you a pale imitation,  
Placed in my garden of ideation.  
In which the flesh of you cannot subsist.

I would never build a wall around you,  
Nor begrudge you the path you take,  
While I rest in the garden I cannot forsake.  
My silence filled with the morning dew.


	8. Mother Daedalus

I fell, you let me fall.  
With wings made of glue.   
You built a net above me,  
Which became a step for you.   
Wood carved from a judas tree,   
To raise yourself up higher.   
As I crash and burn below,  
A canopy to my pyre,  
A net I needed long ago.  
But now it means nothing at all.


End file.
